emptiness. mindfulness.

Posted by in letters to the boys

there is such a hole where ayrie should be.  i know he’s in my heart (as shiya reminds me) but i miss that smile, those curls, the curiosity, the hugs, the caring, the wonder, the awe.  my teacher.  my love.  you are greatly missed every day but with a great sense of loss these days, the holidays, the days that mark the passing of time.

i am reading about mindfulness.  Listening to my breathing.  Reading ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’ by Viktor Frankl and the ‘The Miracle of Midfulness’ by Thich Nhat Hanh.  Watched a PBS show with Shiya about the Buddha.  I’m still very sad but not destitute so I think the books are helping.