Unleashing my joy, my creativity, my truth
A few months ago I did a reading with Sonia Choquette. I’ve read several of her books and was very nervous about the phone call. I managed to call her late and unprepared, scribbling notes on scrap paper in a gold marker. I’ve moved the scraps of paper from place to place, always promising to revisit them, to devote time and attention to the meaning. This post is my pulling together of the ideas so I can see them in one place and begin to reflect.
- I am a whole brained person who is perceptive and insecure.
- I have great capacity to give good guidance
- I see myself as a secret outsider
- I am not expressing what I know to be true
- I get so caught up in other people’s energy that I say things that aren’t in harmony with who I really am
My past lives…
- In past lives I have been an outsider and second class citizen. This is a soul wound that I don’t need to carry into this life. That’s not this soul life–don’t relive an old soul story
Advice to live by…
- don’t hide in this life
- share myself
- flow. when in doubt, go to my gut for guidance
- trust myself. don’t expect an assault
- trust that the world can take me as me
- I don’t have to lose myself to take care of someone else
- I can care for others, but not care-take. When I care-take I run away as a strategy to get oxygen.
- I should treat adults as adults. (Hmmm….note to self. maybe I should revist Â the book a friend recommended about being an adult in relationships)
What to do…
- Attend one of her trainings
- Write to Ayrie
- Write about Ayrie
- Live a more authentic life by changing my own value system and totally tune in to what serves me, serves my soul
What’s in store for me….
- I can really help the world
- I will become a person with a public and inspirational presence
- My authenticity will attract people and it comes from within
The veil between the worlds is thinning.Â Â
There is so much about this that speaks to me. True, maybe it speaks to you too, seems generic, but I chose to see these statements as important to me and where I am in my life right now. I do see myself as an outsider and avoid a lot of situations because I’m the only one who is single, the only single parent, the only one without money, the only one who is overweight, the only one who isn’t smart, etc. And I do often feel unsafe in these situations, expecting people to assault me verbally by dismissing me, judging me, or criticizing me. I assume that people won’t accept me for me and that I need to change something about me or my life circumstances to be wanted, loved, and/or accepted. But if I was living from a place of authenticity, this wouldn’t matter. I would need only to judge myself only by the extent to which I am guided my my intuition and according to my own values–by the extent to which I live an authentic life. If I did that I have no doubt my life would change quickly and in wonderful ways.
You dream big, long to live a creative life full of connection and flow, but All the pushing, Force + FOllowing other people’s path HAS LEFT you exhausted or confused + You Want OUt of the box.