Ayrie’s Sunset

Posted by in letters to the boys

Last weekend Jeff, Eliza, Jonah, Orion, Emily, Ian, Shiya, Be and I went to a cabin in Northern Minnesota.  I just had this feeling that I needed to be in nature and needed to be near water.  It turned out to be perfect and quite healing for me.  I am so grateful that my siblings and their families obliged and indulged me!

The first night that we were there Jeff, Ian, Jonah, Orion and I went out in a large fishing row boat.  The day was unseasonably warm for October, in the mid-50’s, and the sky was clear.  It was almost dinner time and the sun was just beginning to set.  It seemed like the right time to row out to the middle of the lake.  Shiya had wandered into the house so we pushed off from the dock and started rowing into the lake.  Suddenly we heard a wail and saw Shiya up on the cabin porch crying for us with desperation.  We rowed back to shore and Emily carried  him out to us.  We put a huge life preserver over his head and he climbed onto my lap.

We pushed off again and began rowing out into the lake.  The sunset was getting more and more intense and the boys and I talked about all the places that Ayrie might be… We talked about the places we would go if we didn’t have a body… playing on the waves… touching the sun…floating in that bright pink ribbon of the sunset… It was a wonderful moment and the sunset took my breath away.  The photos below were taken with a point and click camera with no special lenses and no editing.  If you click through to the height of the sunset you might see why it felt like Ayrie was with us.